As Young As You . . . Look

So maybe I wasn’t very well prepared. But on an impromptu visit to ASDA, with £20 stuffed into my jeans I didn’t expect to run into such a problem, and such an embarrassing one at that.


After failing miserably to finish my coursework a week before the deadline I took a break and went to the supermarket. Perhaps if I’d slumped down and watched mind numbing TV I’d have spared myself the shame of the ‘incident,’ but life’s full of those annoying ‘If only’s . . .’ isn’t it?

I was just leaving when I spotted ‘One Tree Hill’ Season 4 for, (sharp intake of breath) just £15! It was such a bargain that I couldn’t forgo the opportunity. I stood re-queuing impatiently, as the checkout girl went through the usual rigmarole speaking very slowly and clearly to the old woman in front of me.

My mind wandered as I saw the age certificate, 15, on the box. I daydreamed, reminisced to when I was 12 and looked old enough to get in to 15 film. For a split second I imagined being asked for ID. Have you ever done that, quite clearly jinxed yourself? Thought something when you shouldn’t? The girl took the DVD. I just knew it was coming. Maybe it was my expression; knowing she was going to wind me up prompted her to do just that.

“Have you got any ID...?” She asked, her voice a child high on helium, drawing out the sentence as though to compound my embarrassment. “Are you kidding me?” I replied, clearly exasperated. “I’m 20!”

“Yeah.” she said patronisingly, looking about 12 herself, “But you do look awfully young!” That was the stinging remark she felt compelled to smirk as I fled from the store, not knowing whether to shake her in anger or break down and cry like the 14 year old she thought I was.

14. She thought I was 14 years old. YEAR 9! I wouldn’t say I could pass for 21, or necessarily 20, but it was an absolute joke. Plus, it was a DVD, not a knife, not alcohol, not cigarettes sold to over 18’s. What was I going to do, beat someone into submission with the cardboard box?

Ok, so DVD’s have an age certificate for a reason, but if you know One Tree Hill season 4 you will know why it’s a 15. A girl (stupidly) puts personal information in a blog and leaves her webcam on all day for anyone to view, attracting a very creepy stalker who attacks her. This is just the kind of scary stuff that 14 year olds need to be warned about people! And what better way to warn them than through the wonderful, powerful and compelling medium of TV and American soaps. Rant over. But I’d love not to look 14.